I have to admit, I like cartoons, especially old school cartoons. I can remember most of my summers
being filled with tuna sandwiches and Looney Tunes. Every cartoon that enlists the method of slap stick comedy, has had a character foolishly mix chemicals, causing an explosion. As you’re reading this, if you’re anything like me, perhaps you are envisioning Daffy Duck blowing off beak. We all laughed at these classic scenes knowing that Daffy was going to be okay, but for many of us, we haven’t been so lucky.
In human social/relational behavior, chemistry is defined asIf you are in pursuit of a lasting relationship, you must value consistency over chemistry.
Let’s be honest, chemistry is superficial. There are things we like about people’s looks and personalities that make us feel good, but then when we begin to see certain flaws in character it can become more difficult to let go, if we need to. If we are led by chemistry alone, we create volatile situations (meaning things can drastically change very quickly), that usually leave us heartbroken. So while chemistry may be a necessary component of romance, you must be wise when mixing, or else you may cause a relational explosion.
On the contrary, consistency provides the security and comfort we all want in real relationships. McDonald’s does have a tasty menu, but the reason most of us eat there, is because we know what we’re gonna get. Big Macs haven’t changed much in 48 years, so when you order one, you know what’s coming. Every now and then, there will be something new under the golden arches just to grab your attention, but the reality is, you will always enjoy that Big Mac.
How many times have you been upset at Facebook, or Twitter because they changed something? Updates happen all the time; some you notice others you don’t, but when you can’t find that button you’re looking for you get frustrated. The change made may even be easier or more beneficial, but you don’t care because you need it to be consistent.
In terms of relational chemistry, the need for constant stimulation, is a sign of immaturity and one’s own lack of focus and commitment. Any lasting and meaningful relationship that brings any sense of fulfillment, will always value consistency over chemistry, even if it is only slightly. Yes, that feeling of great chemistry is good and exciting in the moment, but in the long run consistency and stability is far better.
© 2015 Team Murph Publishing/DJoaquin Publishing, All Rights Reserved
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*Daffy Duck and Looney Tunes are property of Time Warner and Warner Brothers.