(A Moment of Transparency)
I’m the baby of my family, so I basically grew up around adults. My dad was a fulltime pastor as far back as I can remember, and my mom was an educator. A lot of my childhood was spent, sitting down and shutting up. Being well-behaved was a major value, given that our house was always entertaining various other adults from various walks of life. So I had to adjust myself. I learned how to keep quiet.
In my adolescence, this led to the erroneous notion that what ever I had to say didn’t matter. I had spent so much time being quiet that I began to believe that no one cared to hear what I had to say. But then, God calls me to preach. I thought out loud, “How could God ever use someone like me? No one cares about what I have to say”.
Have you ever felt like that? Like opening your mouth wouldn’t make a difference, so why even speak? Like no one listens, so why bother. Let me tell you, that is a trick of THE enemy. You have a powerful voice, and you have something to say. You have remarkable ideas that the world needs to hear. You have an extraordinary creativity that people need to experience. You have an amazing perspective, that needs to be expressed. You have a powerful testimony that will bless so many other lives, and you really need to share it.
It wasn’t my parents fault that I believed a lie. I allowed my experience to shape my possibilities, not realizing that my timidity was a wall, built with my own hands. Eventually I had to face my reluctance to open my mouth, because God, Himself, filled it. I know what the prophet meant by having fire shut up in my bones.
If God wanted to use my weak, insignificant voice, how much more could He use yours. No matter how irrelevant you may think your voice is, it is exactly what someone needs to hear.
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