A couple of months ago, the hard drive on my computer crashed. It happens. Either I bumped it too hard, or a program corrupted it, or perhaps it just wore out. I’m not really sure why, but it crashed. So I take in to be fixed, and the technician informs me that with installing a new hard drive, I may lose some information. I wouldn’t lose EVERYTHING, but there were a couple of very important things, that may no longer be there. He said, they would save as much as they could, but the computer would basically have to be reset, to its original settings. So even all the things that I did to personalize my home screen and menus would be all gone. In other words, I was able to save the computer, and have it, but it just wouldn’t be the same.
Many times in life, we go through the same thing in our relationships. Whether you’re talking about parent to child, husband to wife, friend to friend, or even coworker to coworker, things happen. It’s hardly ever anything intentional, or malicious, but things happen. No one set out to do anything wrong, but things happen. Things happen to cause us to go through a relationship reset. The relationship is not destroyed, but things are no longer the same. Here are 5 things to remember after a relationship reset:
- Things may NEVER be like they were. This is especially true when you’re the one who has done something that is perceived as bad. Christians say it but rarely does it happen, that we forgive AND forget. The key here is to try to treat people as if, what ever it was, never happened. For my computer, I can’t even remember how I got some of the settings that I had become accustomed to. Now that they are gone, I have to readjust to my new reality; and the same may be true of your relationship reset.
- Resetting can make you more self-aware. This is both in a good and bad way. On one hand, there may be something about yourself that needs improving, and this relationship reset opens your eyes to it. On the other hand, your self-awareness may make you skittish, and apprehensive in your relationships with others. Either way, you become more careful with the people in your life.
- A changed relationship does not equal a failed relationship. Going through a reset, doesn’t mean you have failed; it simply means you’re human. One of the biggest things about being in a relationship, is the allowance for us to be human and make mistakes. (Which leads us to the next point …)
- People are not disposable. I know Beyoncé got us all thinking that people are irreplaceable, but the truth of the matter is, that people can’t just be thrown away for just any little thing. My computer was still usable, and valuable, so it was worth fixing the problem, even though things are now different. People are the same. We can’t be quick to toss people out of our lives; just reset and salvage the relationship.
- Relationships require maintenance. Relationships aren’t always smooth sailing, but they require tender, loving care. Just like your car, your home, or your computer, relationships need to be checked, and tightened up, if you want it to last for the long haul.
© 2016 Derek J. Murphy Enterprises, and I AM KINGDOM Publishing, All Rights Reserved.
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